“1. Is it possible to practice drills alone without anybody else?

2. How can I turn the things that I have learned into something more permanent inside of me?” – Walter L. from Newport, AR

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

The answer to that is simple yet profound: Practice And Practice Some More.

I’m not telling you to spend hours of your day talking to all of the women out there (read: including ones you aren’t interested in), just to learn more on meeting them. No. Just pick a few women to talk to per day. Maybe 25. And pick ones that you actually find attractive.

Approach them. Use what I have taught to open, thread and chat, touch and physically escalate and get her number.

Regardless of what happens, move through those awkward phases because in only several days (much less than a week), you will be more excited, instead of nervous, about this due to how fun and easy meeting women actually is.

This isn’t scary or nerve-racking, unless you simply aren’t used to talking to strangers. So get more comfortable with chatting and move to ask for her number. Then, keep those skills warm by continuing to talk to attractive women.

The truth is: this is the greatest practice you can get out there. Soccer and saxophone practice won’t give you sex in the end, after all, right? 😉

“I have trouble introducing attractive and fun conversational topics with women. Primarily, I ask questions in order to pick up cues to ask some more or to make commands and statements. The thing is, I can never find anything interesting to talk about. I’m sure you will advise me to buy conversation cure, but I just don’t have money for that right now lol. I’m only 19, but I want to start my game up as soon as I can. I think it would help me tons if you had any basic conversation skills I can use. I understand a lot about body language and things, but I simply have no idea how to start up my skills in conversation. It’s horrible to be in this position…” – Kenneth C. from Lenexa, MO

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

To be honest, you definitely called me out on that, but I’ll still tell you a secret. Since I only have several words to teach you this, I have to make it count. Everybody’s Most Interesting Subject Is Themselves!

So, this constant worry that you have because you ask her personal questions to thread onto new subjects… (Good job by the way. These newsletters really have worked for you. A+ for using your brains) …that constant worry is very unfounded.

Deep inside, she wants you to ask about her friends, her family, her desires, passions, experiences and dreams. So if you let her eel talking, she will find you extremely interesting.

I know this sounds strange, but try it out. Ask her about her passions and go from there. She will blow your mind. Just make sure that you touch her as you listen and that you physically escalate things.

If you are genuinely interested as she talks about herself and escalate things physically the entire time, there is no way you won’t succeed much, much more with women compared to your current state, most of all after you practice a bit more.

“Hi Derek, first of all, I want to thank you for this chance to share what’s in my heart and mind. My question is: how can I win my ex-girlfriend back? I was dumped two weeks ago and we had only been together for two months.” – Nicholas O. from Ocala, FL

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

One that brings all of the “get your ex back” advice together that I have been giving out as of late: Whenever You Invest More Time In Her Compared To What She Does For You, You Will Lose Her Forever!

Emotion and love have a purpose when it comes to meeting women – a huge one, for that matter. Love is probably the most beautiful thing that you can do for a woman and is very important in any man’s future.

However, you seem to be positive that she is perfect for you and it has only been two months. Two Months! Why, it takes even longer than that to get a custom car painted and sent to a Honda dealer. (And those guys are fast.)

How do you expect to find out if a person is right for you that quickly? The answer is that you can’t. What you’re experiencing is lust as opposed to love. You want her emotionally and physically, but you aren’t in love.

You feel invested in her because of the ton of compliance that you’ve been giving her. But it’s not love. Here is the dirty, quick secret for you here: give her some space! Cut contact. Be completely brutal and pull yourself away from this hurtful situation.

Right now, all you are doing is hurting yourself when you’ve already taken a shot to the arm. Cut contact. Make her run after you for a bit. When she runs back, attract her the way you would any new woman in your life. But this time, make use of the tactics that I have taught and do not give your dominance up too fast, either.

Sorry if this was brutal, but it was for your own good. No matter how much you might hate me now, you’ll thank me later on. I promise. 🙂

“The seduction game is really fun, but I do want to take things up a notch. And by that I mean that I want to start directly attracting her from the start and start things up right from there. I want things to go cool and fast.

Any ideas on how to help me here? Any info will be thanked and respected.” – James B. from Shawnee, OK

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

Everything has to do with your focus and your mindset. Focus on being attractive and you will be attractive. Even better – set your focus on her and getting physical with her. Then, have fun, relax and let your intentions lead the way.

As a matter of fact, take a look at the answer that I gave yesterday on your intentions. This will pump up your entire game in no time and is exactly what you need, I think. 🙂

“I received your issue of Rake Letter where you asked us for questions. Well, I have one. I have read about the mistakes of body language while sitting, like crossing the arms or legs, leaning back with our head in our hands, etc. However, I have never read about desirable postures to take depending on each image I want to convey (sexual, friendly, dominant, etc.).” – Tad P. from Agawam, MA

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

The general rule is to stay relaxed. Find places to lean, stand or sit that make you feel more relaxed. Everything else will depend on the situation, but if you concentrate on relaxing all the time, you will never convey stiff, creepy or weird body language. As a matter of fact, you will attract a lot more women this way compared to having a forced and perfect posture. Try it.

“I find it hard to start up conversations with girls in quiet places – whenever there’s a cute girl at a quiet library, for example – and even when we’re at the pool and everybody’s around to listen. What’s the rap when it comes to such situations? And when you’re at the grocery, still getting yours while she’s in line? What can I do without scaring her away from the store?” – Thomas T. from Riverside, CA

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

When at the grocery, you’ll have to line up behind her or give her up and blame the circumstance. You could start speaking to her and using the tactics for a direct and regular approach. However, that would drop a huge nuclear bomb. And if you are worried about other people hearing you chat up a girl, you’re practically screwed.

The truth is: the majority of people are self-centered, so they won’t notice if you chat her up. If they do, anyway, who cares? You’re speaking to someone pretty. They’ll either just be jealous or happy for you. If it’s the latter, great. They might even try to help you succeed. If they happen to be jealous, then they’re just hoping to be either one of you.

Take both instances as compliments and don’t worry about approaching her since nobody will stop or judge you if you end up messing things up or not. You had the guts to approach her and people should appreciate that in their subconscious.

I have been doing this for a decade now and have never had anybody approach me about talking to a girl. Anyway, if they had, I would’ve thought they were nuts. So stop worrying. Allow others to hear you and be proud of it. 🙂 She’ll love it and that’s all that matters.

“I am 29 years old and have only dated 17 different women because I get attached easily and end up dating each one longer. Whenever I’m single, I usually have around 6 women running after me until I date one and lose the others.

I suppose my greatest frustration when it comes to women would be that the minute I actually date one – and this is probably more my fault – is that they like me a lot and I end up spending a lot of time with them; then, the moment I fall for them after several months, they lose interest in me. It’s like they’re happier being with me in the beginning, but after I dedicate more time to them, they start feeling like I’m less special and get sick of me. I think this is because I appear to be needy by devoting a lot of time to them, but I find it very difficult to change this.

I mean, I’m already aware that I shouldn’t be dedicating so much time to them, so I know the problem is me and not them. So yes… very hard for me to deal with this.” – Carlos C. from Birmingham, AL

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

17’s a very good number. You’ve been doing well. Anyway, there is a very simple reason why these women are losing interest. You start things off by being the guy she cannot date. You are, therefore, unattainable.

The minute she wins you over, she becomes fascinated by the thought of taming you. After some time, this fascination wears off and she comes to notice that you’re just another normal guy. This bores her and makes her move on. It’s an extremely common problem, so don’t worry about it.

All you have to do is make sure that, the minute you find yourself in a relationship, you stay sexual, passionate and dominant. Keep doing all of the things that you did when she wanted you to begin with.

The minute you turn into somebody else in her eyes, you will lose her interest. So, always be yourself and keep the special stuff about you to yourself and you will be alright.

“I want to get it on with several women that are much older than me (this one women, in particular). It’s not that I fancy her a lot or anything. I just love the idea of easy lays and think she may enjoy it (she’s 17 years older and divorced).

I have a problem, though. How can I bring this idea to her head or at least bring it to that particular level while skipping the regular dating bit? Do older women have sex with younger men with nothing but sex in mind?? Should I just ask for it straight up?” – Jesse R. from Plattsburgh, NY 

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

This might ruffle you up somewhat, but the truth is: women, most of all the older ones, do not usually want relationships purely for sex. Because of this, you have to approach her the way you would any other.

Start learning more about her. Get her number and follow the tactics found in DeadlySeduction. The older (and married) a woman gets, the more emotional attention she usually craves as opposed to sex. Mostly because she knows she can sleep with practically anyone.

So, stand out by being someone who gives her emotional orgasms – the kind of emotional contentment that she can’t get from others. Once you bag this role, getting sex from her will be much easier, more fun and definitely more fulfilling.

On the other hand, relationships based purely on sex usually blossom from dating and friendships, so choose one of those routes, if you’d prefer. 🙂

“My problem has two parts to it. I find it easy to be sexual with women when not in isolation and I know that it should be easier in isolation. However, seduction is more difficult to click during the necessary state in order to isolate her and seduce her after every bit of attraction is needed. My motive with women is always sexual and I have great drive. However, my overall sex life is in pain because I have difficulties overcoming the difficulties I have with isolation in a seductive mindset. I hope you can offer up some advice on this.” – George M. from Coinjock, NC 

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

You should know that isolation – in itself – is attractive for women because they search for men with dominance and social status. Proper isolation shows her how great you are with women and attracts her to you.

Having sexual intentions with women during isolation is really all that you would need to arouse them, most of all if you touch them and escalate things physically at the same time. So, stop trying to attract her to you and concentrate on getting her comfortable and relaxed around you instead.

The main difference between the guys that she is comfortable with in a friendly way and the guys she is comfortable with in a sexual way would be the amount of physical escalation that you use. So always touch her and keep things smooth while making sure she stays comfortable.

Attraction should be your last problem, right after “how can I stop her from ripping off my clothes then and there?” 😉

“I’m quite good with openers, but sometimes, that’s as far as I get. I hardly ask for phone numbers since I feel like the chance to do so never really comes out. Whenever I’m out, I’m either very cocky or very nice. None of these mindsets work. If I’m nice, girls ignore me, but if I’m cocky, they see me as a douche. My female interactions hardly ever involve substance, simply put.

So, I have a question: what mindset do I need to go on the town with? Do you have any examples of how to look at certain things? Also, how can I create substantial interactions with women? I want good interactions in order to escalate things and see women again.” – Edward S. from Benton Harbor, MI

Derek Rake’s Answer:-

You need to find a medium that is happy. Cockiness is never a turn-on and niceness isn’t, either. Be friendly and dominant in order to turn women on. Be dominant. Be confident. And always be friendly with anyone around her.

Earn her trust and she will get turned on by your actions instead of your words. Touch her a lot and escalate things on a physical level. Isolate her. Also, the entire time, learn more about her and do basic sexual shaping.

Since you’ve only been choosing from extremes at the moment, you have to find a middle ground to depend on. Being dominant and warm can give you that.

When it comes to substantial conversations, just be interesting. Shit dude, just say something interesting or talk about things that you find interesting. If there is nothing interesting for you to talk about, mention something you are very passionate about or make her start up a conversation about her own passions.

Ask her, “What’s your passion? Why do you love it so much?” Then learn to like something about those passions of hers or about her, in general.

Doing all of that will make you a highly interesting guy – I promise. 🙂