Are you making any of these five atrocious communication mistakes men make with women?

These mistakes may sound harmless. If you didn’t know any better, you’d swear these communication habits are even GOOD ones to have.

And yet each mistake critically sabotages your efforts to move women up the IRAE Model. If you’ve been using Shogun Method and getting lackluster results, these may be why.

So to be a more successful Shogun, avoid these five communication mistakes at all costs:

Mistake #1: Leaving Escalation Up To Her

Imagine this. You’re with a woman you like, and you’re building Rapport with her. You’re using the tried-and-true formula of Mirroring and Verbal Mimicking.

You’re waiting for her to Mirror YOUR movement. It’s a sign that she’s at the Rapport Inflexion Point, and that she’s ready for escalation onto the Attraction Stage.

Then, after a while, you spot what seems to be the Rapport Inflexion Point. (See Module 5 of the core Shogun Method program if you’re not familiar with this.) You smiled and stretched, and she smiled and stretched, too. This is it.

Or is it?

You’re not sure. Her smiling and stretching could have been an accident or coincidence. It could have been the Rapport Inflexion Point or not.

What do you do now?

• Do you wait for a clearer sign from her before you escalate to Attraction? Such as if she asks if you want to get a drink at her place?
• Or do you escalate anyway, and invite her to a drink at your place – at the risk of getting rejected?

Most newer Shoguns err on the side of caution and pick the first choice. They wait until she makes it absolutely, positively clear she’s attracted to them. And THEN they escalate.

You might have had the same approach, as well. You might have thought it was more respectful of her to do it that way. You didn’t want to offend her or insult her intelligence. Or something.

In the bigger picture, though, it’s very different. Imagine if it WERE the Rapport Inflexion Point. She was clearly attracted to you, and she was dropping a hint. And you ended up NOT doing anything.

That’s frustrating and infuriating for women.

So the first option actually turns women off. It makes them think you’re weak and indecisive, and that you don’t “own” the choices you make in life.

And it’s off to the friendzone with you.

So avoid making this mistake. At the first sign of attraction, escalate with an Implanted Command. And if she doesn’t take it well, follow up with an Anti-Demand and try again later.

Mistake #2: Proposing Too Soon

You might have made this mistake in the past. You’ve had one or two dates with a woman, and things are going well. She likes and trusts you, and she’s even telling you her deepest, darkest secrets. You’re fairly sure you’d like a more serious relationship with her.

Back then, you might have thought: “She’s had bad boyfriends before. Men who lied to her and took her for granted. I’ll be different. I’ll be honest with her from the get-go.”

And so you propose. “I love you. Will you be my girlfriend?”

Then she rejects you or makes a half-hearted attempt at letting you down easy. Or you get an awkward silence. No matter what happens, your relationship is never the same again.

Sound familiar?

So what happened?

You may have thought that she’d appreciate your honesty. And, truth be told, she might have.

And yet overall, proposing too soon sabotages your chances with her.

It makes women think:

• That you might have no other options
• That you might be desperate or needy
• That you might be taking advantage of her vulnerable state

Instead of proposing AT ALL, simply focus on the task at hand: Escalating through the IRAE Model. Stick to the program and the relationship will happen by itself. No proposals necessary.

Mistake #3: Complaining And “Opening Up”

Since “being vulnerable and open” is all the rage in society right now, this one’s an easy trap to fall into.

It’s become common knowledge that being open about your flaws, fears, weaknesses, etc. is a “good thing.” And so men in the workplace and in the public square are all given the same message: Be vulnerable.

Unfortunately, this has spilled into the realm of dating and relationships. With disastrous effects, of course.

These days, too many men believe that complaining and “opening up” will make women like and trust them more. They think: “The ladies love men who are in touch with their feelings.”

Um, no, they don’t.

If you’re single, your vulnerability will put you in women’s friendzone instantly.

If you’re in a relationship, it’s even worse. Your vulnerability will rattle her to the core. Suddenly, she’ll think you’re too weak to handle a real relationship, let alone a family. After all, you’re so easily vexed.

This is an instinctive reaction for women, by the way. She doesn’t feel safe with you, so she’ll want to get away from you and find safety elsewhere. Perhaps another man. That’s usually how it goes.

So take this bit of wisdom with you: Never let her see you “bleed.” With women, you should always project an aura of strength, dominance, and self-control.

Mistake #4: Agreeing With Everything She Says

Imagine meeting a new woman who’s young, smart, and really hot. You really like her, and it seems she likes you, too.

Except one day, out of nowhere, she expresses an opinion that you totally disagree with.

It might have been a political opinion. Or a religious one. Or a philosophical one. Whatever it was, you’re not on board with it AT ALL.

What do you do?

• Do you tell her you disagree and then risk getting rejected and losing her?
• Or do you pretend to agree with her and keep escalating anyway?

If you chose the second option, then I have some bad news. “Pretending to agree” is committing the Shogun Method sin of “forced familiarity.” And women will detect it almost immediately – she’ll feel like something’s “off” about you.

Women have a sixth sense about these things. It’s like a “secret language” women naturally speak and understand. And they use it to spot liars a mile away.

Keep this in mind: No one likes a suck-up.

So learn to be okay with breaking Rapport and using Fractionation. The idea is to make her conform to YOUR reality, not the other way around. Always be ready to let a woman go if she doesn’t conform.

Mistake #5: Initiating Communication More Than She Does

This involves texting, calling, and chatting on the Internet. Do you initiate these conversations more than she does? Or worse: Are you the only one initiating these conversations?

Some men think it’s harmless to initiate communication. They think it’s a sweet gesture that tells a woman: “I’m thinking of you,” which makes her like them more.

Unfortunately, all it tells a woman is: “He wants to be more than friends with me.” And with that, all the mystery and excitement is gone.

How do they know? Simple — it’s their little sixth sense again. It’s meant to protect them from men who say one thing and then end up doing something different. And it does a good job at it, too.

Always keep in mind Shogun Method’s Precondition #2:

To conceal your intentions until the manipulation is complete.

Initiating communication may seem harmless. And yet it reveals your intentions instead of concealing them.

So do this from now on: Only initiate communications with her once for every two times she does it. This keeps your intentions concealed and establishes the “feel” that SHE’S chasing YOU.

About That Women “Sixth Sense”

So how many of these five mistakes are you making?

Did you notice the common thread that runs through these five mistakes?

It’s the “sixth sense” that women have. That Secret Language that comes second-nature to women, but is an absolute mystery to men.

It lets them find out the “real deal” about the men they meet. It helps them weed out the weak little boys who can’t handle relationships from the real men who can.

Now, here’s what that should mean to you. If you knew what this secret language was all about, then women would make complete sense to you. Everything about them will be crystal clear – their quirks, their motivations, their mind games… everything.

Put simply, you’ll understand women completely. And you’ll get much more of the results you want with them.

My advice? Learn the language as soon as you can. You can do so by immersing yourself in the new “The Secret Language: The Shogun’s Guide To Subcommunication Mastery” program.

The program is not for sale. However, you can get it for free with every purchase of the Dark Rapport program. For more information, click here.

If you are already a Dark Rapport client, we have already added the program inside your Dark Rapport download area.

Are you in a situation where you can’t go out and meet your woman as often as you want?

What if you could continue using Shogun Method on her online or over text?

And not just that – what if you could move her EVEN CLOSER to Enslavement than ever before?

Let me tell you how your more experienced Shoguns deal with such situations.

These are the Shoguns who usually escalate with their women the normal way. That’s face-to-face. And yet sometimes, they find themselves in situations where it’s nearly impossible to do so.

For instance, their jobs force them to be isolated for a period of time.

Or once in a while, a pandemic comes along and locks everyone down wherever they are.

You know how it is.

The smart Shogun knows that until Enslavement is achieved, attraction fades away quickly. And nothing makes attraction go away more than the lack of communication.

So the smart Shogun turns to the next best thing: The Internet.

Let’s pause right there. How DO you apply Shogun Method techniques online and over text? 

After all, many of our techniques and Sequences require we be face-to-face with our women. Online, all we see are words on a screen.

In this Insider’s Guide, we’ll talk about how to apply Shogun Method online and over text. That way, you can keep escalating with your woman even when you’re away from each other.

How To Use Shogun Method Online & Over Text

In Shogun Method, we use the IRAE Model. It’s the framework of Intrigue, Rapport, Attraction, and Enslavement. In that order, without skipping any stage.

The IRAE Model also applies when you escalate with your woman online. Let’s take the Intrigue Stage. You’d use the modified Intrigue Ping to grab her attention and prime her for Rapport-building.

It’s just as important to know how to build Rapport online, if not more so. The danger is the same: Developing Contextual Rapport.

In the real-world, Contextual Rapport makes her see you less as her lover and more as someone useful to her. Online, it’ll make her take you for granted – which is basically slipping into the friend-zone.

And online, the risk for Contextual Rapport is even bigger. It’s hard to imagine the emotions behind words on a screen. And women – including yours — text and chat with other men besides you.

So let’s avoid Contextual Rapport at all costs, shall we?

Let’s talk about two of the most easily modified techniques in our arsenal:

Multiple Outs and VAKSOG Modes.

Multiple-Outs Over Text

The Multiple Outs technique operates on the established psychological principle that:

The more she feels you understand her, the more attracted she gets.

You’ll want your woman to feel: “Wow, he really understands me. I’m lucky to have met him,” or “Wow, I’ve never met a guy who ‘gets it’ as he does. I’m never letting him go.”

When you get her to feel that way, then you’re sure to get a “Yes” the next time you ask to meet-up face-to-face.

And that’s the challenge when chatting or texting. When you ask her a question and her answer is “No,” then she’ll start wondering whether you really “get it” after all. Not good.

The Multiple Outs technique “hacks” the conversation. It makes her feel you DO understand her, no matter how she might respond to your statement or question.

As a result, the Multiple Outs technique makes her more excited to meet you face-to-face again. That, in turn, means you can get right back to escalating much more quickly.

The formula is simple:

• “You’re not ____, are you?”
• “It’s not ____, is it?”
• “____ hasn’t ____, right?”

Let’s see them in action.

Here’s a common question sent over text:

“Was wondering. In the big picture, are you just looking for something short-term?”

This is bad in the sense that she can easily answer “No,” which in turn hammers home the idea that you don’t get her at all.

So here’s a better Multiple Outs version of the same question:

“Was wondering. In the big picture, you’re not just looking for something short-term, are you?”

Now, if she answers “Yes, I’m not really in it for the long haul,” you can then say: “I knew it. Same here. Like you, I just want to have fun and be happy.”

Or if she answers “No, I’m in it for the long-term,” you can then say: “Didn’t think so. I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

Either way, she gets the impression that you DO understand her.

More of these Multiple Outs statements and you’ll be building Rapport with her quite quickly. It’ll be enough to make her start missing you. A lot.

For a more complete treatment of the Multiple Outs technique, check out the Shogun Method Black Book.

VAKSOG Technique Over Text

VAKSOG is an acronym for the six main ways a woman can process information around her:

• Visual (by seeing)
• Auditory (by hearing)
• Kinesthetic (by doing)
• Somatosensory (by touching)
• Olfactory (by smelling)
• Gustatory (by tasting)

Every woman subconsciously has one or two dominant “VAKSOG Modes.” You can, and should, communicate with your woman using the correct VAKSOG Mode. Even online, it makes her feel a much stronger emotional bond towards you.

She’ll come to the following conclusion: “I don’t know how, but he totally understands me. He’s the real deal. I’m never letting him go.” And she’ll never doubt her own conclusions.

So how can you tell what her dominant VAKSOG Mode is? It’s actually easier online because her replies come to you in text, which you can review. It’s harder to do that when you’re talking face-to-face.

For more on VAKSOG Mode matching, check out Dark Rapport.

Simply take note of the action words she uses in replies. Let’s use the following example:

• YOU: “I just remembered you’re a wine lover. What do you like about it so much?”
• HER: “Oh, it just gets me dreaming. It’s my safe space. There’s nothing a glass of red can’t fix for me.”

This conversation tells you she’s Kinesthetic – she’s all about doing and experiencing.

You can then personalize your response by using Kinesthetic action words:

YOU: “Oh, I got what you mean. That sounds enticing. I’ve been working a bit too hard lately. I wonder what it’s like to unwind like that. What wine would you recommend for a weary old soul like mine?”

You’ll notice she’ll chat with you longer. and be more excited to meet up, when you take a few extra moments to craft the right response.

Here’s another example…

• YOU: “I was just wondering. If money weren’t an issue, where would you live and what type of house would you have?”
• HER: “Oh, that’s easy. I’d love a house with a balcony overlooking Nantucket Sound. I saw a similar house in Gilmore Girls once and I knew. That was my dream house with a dream view.”

This tells you she’s a Visual person. She processes her world primarily through her eyes.

A good personalized response would then be:

• YOU: “Oh, I see. I know what you mean because I saw that house, too. That was beautiful. Well, at least now we got our sights set on a target.”

Practice spotting your woman’s VAKSOG modes whenever she speaks. Practice tailoring your responses accordingly. It will result in faster Rapport building, whether online or face-to-face.

As with Multiple Outs, the key is to make your woman conclude that you’re a guy worth spending her life with. Building Rapport fast is the most straightforward way of making this happen.

Your End Game

Remember your goal. Chat with your woman to boost your Shogun Method game when you see her face-to-face. No matter how hard you try, you can’t escalate through the entire IRAE Model virtually. In fact, the more you try, the worse your results.

The key is to build Rapport online fast, and then schedule the next face-to-face meet-up as soon as you can. The more you spend time with her physically, the more easily you’ll escalate all the way to Enslavement. That’s the endgame, after all.

To get all the online Shogun Method fundamentals you’ll ever need, use the Online Dating Playbook 2.0 (ODP 2.0) system. It will equip you with all the necessary hacks that you will need to make your Shogun Method techniques work – without having to be in person with your woman. You’ll also get two bonuses for free: “5.TXT – Five Texting Sequences” and “The Numb3rs Game” for free. Click here (and scroll down to the bonuses section) for details.

As a Shogun, you should already familiar with the Three Preconditions, namely:

• Precondition #1: To accept your true nature as a manipulator;
• Precondition #2: To conceal your intentions until the manipulation is complete; and
• Precondition #3: To protect the secrecy and sanctity of Shogun Method.

The Three Preconditions have been the backbone of Shogun Method for the longest time. Meanwhile, these days I’ve been considering adding a fourth Precondition. And it’s all in response to a disturbing development in modern society.

Yes, my friends, there’s a psychosocial plague sweeping through the world today. The politically-correct term for this plague is “Vulnerability.” It means the ability to be completely open and upfront about your flaws and weaknesses. And that’s even with the risk of getting hurt, judged, or maligned.

To modern society, vulnerability is a good thing – something to be championed.

To me, a more appropriate term for it would be “Bleeding.” You’re basically showing your “wounds” to absolutely anyone in the world. And you do so whether they’re interested or not.

And no, it has absolutely no place in a romantic relationship. Admitting your flaws and weaknesses to your woman is relationship suicide.

Vulnerability turns men into wimps and ruins happy relationships. Don’t let it happen to yours.

This Insider’s Guide is all about never letting your woman see you Bleed. Even if society tells you to, and even if she herself asks you to.

The Cult of Bleeding

You’ve probably noticed how society glorifies the Bleeding man. He’s honest, trustworthy, likeable, relatable, and – to women – “husband-material.”

Unfortunately, you might have experienced this before. When your woman sees you Bleed, your relationship suffers. She might rush to your side to comfort you and give you affection, but you can sense it. She’ll feel very, very uneasy moving forward.

Vulnerability is one of the reasons why the divorce rate is still sky-high in most parts of the modern world. Wives no longer feel secure in their marriages. They instinctively start looking for other men to provide that security. Couple that with divorce laws that heavily favor women, and you have a recipe for disaster.

And here’s the kicker. Most of these women actually still love their vulnerable ex-husbands. You’ll hear them give the same baffling excuses:

• “I still love him, but I’m no longer in love with him.”
• “I still love him, but I don’t want to be married to him.”
• “I still love him, but we had irreconcilable differences.”

So what’s going on?

It all boils down to every woman’s deepest, most basic need. And that is to be led and dominated by a strong, capable man.

Bleeding tells her that you’re the exact opposite of that kind of man. And as a result, every time you let her see you Bleed, you move further away from Enslavement.

I write against vulnerability in my new premium program, The Invulnerability Principle. More on that later. For now, let’s take a look at how Shoguns like yourself can – and should – do from now on.

How to Stop the Bleeding (Three Ways)

Are you in a relationship and you’ve caught the vulnerability plague? Then there are three ways you can stop the Bleeding quickly:

1. By never Bleeding again, even if she asks you;
2. By hiding or delegating your weaknesses;
3. And by using physical affection as a weapon.

Let’s take a look at each method in turn.

#1: Never Bleed, Even If She Asks You

She might ask you: “Why are you so quiet? I want you to open up to me more.”

Or: “I’d appreciate it if you were more upfront and forward with me. I feel like I’m the only one who’s opening up in this relationship.”

If it sounds like emotional blackmail, that’s because it is. Women love it because it’s so effective. And yet even if you feel the urge to do exactly what she says, don’t.

Sometimes, she means what she’s asking. She genuinely wants you to open up so she can know you better.

Other times, it’s a trap. She wants you to display your inadequacy as a partner, which in turn gives her an excuse to take half your stuff.

So that’s the first way to avoid the trap. Never Bleed, even if she asks you to.

Laugh it off. Joke about it. Tell her everything’s fine. Or say, “Sure, I’ll try that,” but you actually never do. You maintain the frame that you’re in total control of yourself and of the relationship.

Here’s the funny thing about this method: It actually makes her love you more down the line. Subconsciously, you’re meeting her deepest need by leading and dominating her. And so you move her closer and closer to Enslavement, if she’s not already there.

#2: Hide Or Delegate Your Weakness.

If you need to cry or rage about something, do it privately. Do it behind locked doors or out in the woods where no one can see or hear you. Whatever you do, DO NOT let her see you Bleed.

If you need to rant or vent, DO NOT do it with her. Save it for your friends, or join accountability groups. When your emotions get the better of you, make sure your woman doesn’t see it.

What if you suffer from depression, anxiety, or some other condition? Then seek professional help. Not only is it a safe way to hide the Bleeding from your woman, but it’s also the fastest way to get back on your feet.

Keep in mind what happens when you let her see you Bleed. She might shower you with affection. She’ll hug you and tell you everything’s going to be okay, and that she’ll always be there for you.

And yet eventually, she’ll think about how weak and useless you were in that moment. And she’ll wonder whether she’s better off with someone else. Don’t ever let it get to that point.

#3: Use Physical Affection As A Weapon.

Now, what if she complains about your quietness? What if she threatens to leave? What if she breaks down and cries, accusing you of taking her for granted or some other crap?

Instead of defending yourself, give her physical affection instead. Hug her. Cuddle her in bed. Give her a massage. Give her good, mind-blowing sex. You get the idea.

Physical affection is the best way to answer such challenges. It does two things:

• First, it balances her hormones, and she reverts to level-headedness…
• And second, it re-establishes your dominance in the relationship. Which, again, is what she really wants. Without words, you’re telling her: “I got this.”

Whatever you do, never try to “defend yourself.” Never get into an argument with her (which does nothing but prove your weakness). Simply exit the conversation as quietly as you can, and then give her some affection she won’t soon forget.

Precondition #4: Never Let Her See You Bleed

The key is to always remember how your woman sees you. When it comes down to it, you’re not her enemy, yet you’re not her friend either. The truth is this: She’s looking out for herself, and always will.

She can’t deny her deepest biological programming. She’s only looking out for her own survival and her kids’, if she has any.

As for you, she’ll only love you for as long as you’re useful to her. Her physical, emotional, and financial needs must be covered in the foreseeable future.  If you can cover her needs, then she’ll gladly call you her boyfriend, husband, partner, etc.

The more you Bleed, the less sure she becomes of the security you provide. And the moment she’s no longer that sure, and you can bet she’ll start shopping around for other, better men.

Now, you might say: “But Derek, I still think vulnerability is a good thing. I can balance it with being useful. I’ll meet my woman’s needs while still being the strong, dominant guy I am. Right?”

All I can say is: Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Remember when your female friends told you they wanted “kind, smart, loyal guys”? Didn’t they end up with assholes? It still happens in marriage. So avoid the trap at all costs. Never let her see you bleed.

Want to learn more about vulnerability and how to fight its influence? Then I recommend you get a copy of my new premium program, The Invulnerability Principle. You can get it for free with every purchase of Shogun Method Black Book Volume 4.

It’s one of the most common questions new Shoguns ask me:

“Can I become good friends with a woman first before I use Shogun Method on her?”

If you’ve ever wondered the same thing, then I know how you feel. Shogun Method can be shocking to the uninitiated. Even going through the Intrigue Stage – the very first step in the IRAE Model – can be scary and daunting.

Still, it’s a good question, and it’s one we’ll explore in today’s Insider’s Guide. Can you work to become good friends with a woman first, and then use Shogun Method?

Let’s see.

How Women See You (And Every Other Guy They Meet)

It helps to understand an undeniable fact about women – that they see men in only one of two ways.

Every man they meet in their lives falls into one of two categories, which are:

#1: As a potential lover. 

If you want a romantic and/or sexual relationship with a woman, then she must see you as a potential lover. It’s the only way to make her your girlfriend, future wife, or friend-with-benefits.

In Shogun Method, this is the goal. As early as the Intrigue Stage, you’re priming your target’s mind to see you as a potential lover. As you progress through the IRAE Model, she feels more and more “in love” with you. It’s a slippery slope towards the ultimate end goal, which is Emotional Enslavement.

For the average woman, very few men in her life get slotted in the “potential lover” category. The vast majority of guys she meets gets lumped into the second category instead, which is:

#2: As a friend.

Obviously, there’s no romance or sex to be had in this category. As her friend, you can ever only be an acquaintance, a buddy she trusts, a business connection, etc.

In the dating arena, this is often called the “friend-zone.” If you’re familiar with the term, then you know the pain and despair that comes with getting slotted into it.

Now here’s the question: How do women decide which category to slot a man into?

Here’s how: By checking the kind of value he presents to her life.

The men she meets pose different kinds and amounts of value to her, such as:

• Conversation value – or being fun, inspiring, or eye-opening to talk to;
• Innate value – or doing cool stuff, knowing important people, having lots of money, etc.;
• Favors – your ability to do things for her that will make her life more pleasurable
• …and of course, sex – or the ability to satisfy her sexual needs.

Now, take a look at the list above. Which of the four do you think women value the most?

If you answered “sex,” you’d be wrong. And here’s why.

Women subconsciously know that nearly EVERY guy she meets can please her in bed. As far as value goes, sex is easy for her to get.

The other kinds of value – favors, money, connections, conversation – are harder for her to get.

And therein lies the rub. By starting out as friends with a woman, you show her that the value you offer is more than just sex. And so she slots you into her “friend zone” straight away.

Oops.

So can you still emotionally enslave a woman who’s already your friend? The answer is “Yes.” You’ll need to decrease the platonic value you’re giving her, and increase your sexual or romantic value. That’s what Shogun Method does.

My advice? Manage your expectations. If you want to get into relationships with women by becoming friends with them first:

• You will have a larger “pool” of women to choose from, and you’ll probably have more fun socially.
• On the other hand, escalating will be more difficult, as there’s an extra step – getting out of the “friend-zone” – to take.

Through it all, the “friend-to-girlfriend” path is still a legitimate strategy to use. Many of your fellow Shoguns now have girlfriends and wives who used to be “just friends.” That can be your success story, too.

How To Make New Female Friends Fast

Making female friends is easy to do when three elements are in place:

1. You see each other a lot
2. You work together a lot
3. You have a shared goal, purpose or mission

These are the reasons why people have BFF’s in school, but never see each other again after graduating. It’s also the reason why the bonds between soldiers are among the strongest.

Now, here’s the problem: Making new friends is tough to do in modern society. It’s hard to see or work with each other for any significant amount of time – everyone’s got their own thing going. Add the pandemic to the mix, and it’s almost out of the question.

So can you still make friends in a world gone mad? Again, the answer is “yes.” And that’s to compress your time frame and give value – lots of it – upfront.

When you meet a new woman in these crazy times, you’ll likely have only one chance to leave an impression. And so you give value hard and fast, giving her a reason to think about you long after you’ve parted ways.

That’ll give her a reason to stay in touch with you, which then gives you more opportunities to escalate.

Now, again, there are different kinds of value you can give a woman, such as:

#1: Conversation Value.

• You can go past small talk and start talking about deeper topics. This is easy to do when you establish some common ground with her.
• You can calmly compliment her and make her feel good about herself. This is ideal for when she’s a confident woman who knows what she’s doing in life. It’s also good for when she tells you about her accomplishments.
• You can inspire her to keep working hard. This is a good idea when she tells you about how she’s currently struggling. Do this also if she’s a timid woman who could use some motivation.
• You can give advice, especially if she tells you about a problem she has and you know how to solve it.

#2: Innate Value.

• If you have a broad network, you can offer to introduce her to someone who can advance her career or business.
• If you’re a popular guy, you can invite her into your clique.
• If you own businesses, you can offer to give her a job or a free sample of your product.
• If you have similar hobbies – let’s say you’re both artists – you can offer to see each other’s work over the weekend.

#3: Favors.

• You can invite her to a party you’re organizing.
• You can introduce her to someone important.
• You can give her a “free sample” of your expertise.
• You can offer her a ride or buy her a meal.

The idea is simple. First, you must be sure she’ll appreciate the kind of value you’ll give her. If you’re popular and she’s a nobody, then she’ll probably appreciate being invited into your clique. If she’s more popular than you, then she probably won’t.

Secondly, the more attractive and accomplished she is, the more value you’ll need to put forward. So be ready to give lots of value upfront. If the value you offer requires her to stay in touch with you, that’s even better.

Once you’re friends and she’s comfortable with you, then start escalating. An easy way would be by Fractionating her between platonic and romantic moods. This will slowly open her up and entice her to the idea of being lovers with you.

A Word Of Caution

It’s important to start escalating as soon as she’s comfortable with you. Otherwise, she’ll get too comfortable and slot you straight into her friend-zone. Shogun Method 101, right?

What’s more, it’s also important to cut off the relationship if you’re not getting any value back from her. It’s okay to give her a ton of value and then not get it back – but only if it happens only once or twice.

If you’ve done her three favors and she’s still not agreeing to meet you for a drink, then she’s probably toying with you. The relationship will not go anywhere, and you’ll be wasting your time, money, and energy.

Unless, of course, you learn to “balance the trades.” That is, you make her give back some value in return for the value you gave her. It’s got to be a win-win thing.

“Balancing the trades” is the key to saving weak relationships. It is also the key to making strong relationships even stronger. It’s a crucial skill to learn if you want to be successful not just with women, but with life in general as well.

Want to learn how to “balance the trades” in your life? Then check out the Social Shogun Guidebook, a new standalone program on social intelligence and persuasion.

A precursor to Beyond Enslavement, the Social Shogun Guidebook adapts a handful of core Shogun Method principles to be used to gain power in everyday situations. Recommended for Shoguns who want to be more persuasive in their daily dealings with people – co-workers, bosses, friends, family, strangers on the street, your enemies or rivals, anyone.

Get the Social Shogun Guidebook free by purchasing Shogun Method Black Book Volume 3.

What is charisma? It’s simply the ability to attract people, both male and female. When you’re charismatic, women want to be with you, and men want to be you.

If you were a charismatic man, the people around you would not be able to explain it. They don’t know what it is about you, but they simply can’t resist you. You’re so easy to like, so easy to trust, and so easy to support whatever you say or do.

That’s charisma, and yes, it can be learned.

In Shogun Method, charisma plays an important role when escalating a woman up the IRAE Model. In fact, having an abundance of charisma can make escalation more enjoyable; it’s a more passive path to Enslavement. In fact, I’d say it might be better suited for the friendlier, or more business-minded Shoguns among us.

Two particular Shoguns come to mind:

• “Vic,” a freelance programmer who molded himself into a charismatic businessman. Over the course of building his business, he met his future wife – his hot secretary.
• “Isaiah,” was such a nice guy he got friend-zoned all his life. Then he trained himself to become the charismatic “alpha” of his social circle. As a result, he snagged the prettiest girl in the group – who also happened to be his childhood crush.

Shoguns like Vic and Isaiah still had to use the IRAE Model to reach the Enslavement stage. And yet thanks to their charisma, escalating was effortless. It was all because the ladies got so attracted that they “escalated themselves.”

And as you become more charismatic, you’ll see these “self-escalations” around you, too.

So in this Insider’s Guide, we’ll shift gears a bit and talk about growing your charisma in everyday situations. It will not only increase your success with women, but improve your quality of life in general as well.

Within Shogun Method, charisma is broken down into its three elements. Let’s go through each of those.

Shogun Charisma: The Three Elements

As with the rest of Shogun Method (especially with Shogun Sequences), you don’t need to internalize the principles of charisma right away. You can – and should – ‘fake it ‘til you make it.’

Think of it this way. Let’s say you just had the absolute best steak of your life, and the chef was kind enough to give you his secret recipe.

Now imagine if you followed the recipe to the letter. You followed the exact same ingredients, process, and tools. Would you come up with the exact same five-star steak?

Of course you would.

Well, the same goes for charisma. All charismatic Shoguns have these three traits in abundance. They are Absolute Certainty, Unconditional Warmth, and Outcome Independence.

Cultivate them, and you’ll become charismatic, too. Internalizing the principles will happen on its own along the way.

Element #1: Absolute Certainty

Put simply, you got to have total belief and confidence in everything you say and do. This confidence is contagious. When people see you with that unshakable belief in yourself, they’ll believe in you, too.

The mindset of “Absolute Certainty” goes like this…

It’s okay to be wrong sometimes, but it’s NEVER okay to doubt yourself.

Why that mantra? It’s all because if you want people to like you, trust you, and feel attracted to you, they need two things:

1. To be sure you know what you’re doing;
2. To be sure what you’re doing is super-important.

And this is easy to achieve when you’re a natural problem-solver. People are drawn to leaders who aren’t fazed by challenges, and instead come up with quick solutions.

Here’s a simple problem-solving process which I personally find quite effective:

1. Identify and understand the problem.
2. Quickly brainstorm possible solutions to the problem – no solution is too crazy.
3. Pick a solution that will have the biggest impact while using the least amount of resources.
4. Execute the solution, see if it worked, and start from the beginning if necessary.

With a system like this, it’s easy to live your life with complete confidence. You won’t always be right, but you’ll never doubt yourself, and that’s the key.

Now, of course, confidence isn’t everything. Lots of confident men in the world aren’t personable and are therefore not charismatic.

That’s why you’ll need the second element, too.

Element #2: Unconditional Warmth

This is when you assume the person you’re talking to – no matter who he or she might be – is a very good friend of yours. And that’s even if you’re meeting them for the very first time.

The modus operandi is the same as in the first trait. If you treat a person like a very good friend, they’ll feel like they are, and they’ll start believing they are. And so they’ll instantly start treating you like someone they can trust with their lives.

The key word is “unconditional.” It shouldn’t matter if the person you’re talking to is a Victoria’s Secret model or the mailman.  You treat them well regardless, making them feel comfortable.

If that sounds hard to do, then try this:

1. Think of a real person in your life that you see as a lifelong buddy. Perhaps it’s your best friend who you can talk about anything with. Think about how warmly you greet him every time you meet up.
2. Learn to bring that same warmth and positivity to every person you interact with. Make them feel welcome, accepted, and free of any judgment.

Now, you might be thinking: “But what if people think I’m weird? What if they feel threatened? What if they think I’m up to something? Wouldn’t that make me creepy instead of charismatic?”

Not if you have if the third Trait in you, which is:

Element #3: Outcome Independence

Yes, live your life with Absolute Certainty. And yes, treat everything with Unconditional Warmth.

And yet through it all, you don’t care about what other people think, and you don’t care if you get anything back. It doesn’t matter if people like you or hate you, or whether they return the favor or act like freeloaders. None of it matters to you.

This is what we call Outcome Independence. You’re not emotionally enslaved to any particular outcome. If people like you or return the favor, great. If they don’t, no worries – you’ll keep on being a charismatic guy wherever you go anyway.

Why is being Outcome-Independent so important to charisma?

Simple – it’s because the opposite of Outcome Independence is Validation-Seeking. That’s when you pretend to be confident and warm all because you want people to like you, or do things for you, etc.

Validation-Seeking is lame and sleazy. People can smell its disgusting stench from miles away.

What’s more, Validation-Seeking cancels out the first trait: Absolute Certainty. When you’re looking for validation and admiration, it means you’re uncertain about the things you say and do. You’re indecisive. You can’t address problems without knowing what other people will think.

So don’t go there. Be decisive and Outcome-Independent at the same time.

That way, wherever you go, you add value to people’s lives. You can help them solve their problems and challenges or simply make them feel good, or both. It should be your “default setting” for life.

And that “default setting” will make you a truly charismatic man.

One Important Caveat

You’ve just learned the three traits that make up charisma – from the Shogun’s perspective. By cultivating them, you’ll have more rewarding relationships moving forward – not only with women.

That being said, here’s an important caveat. Just because you’re Outcome Independent doesn’t mean you maintain unfair relationships.

When certain people treat you unfairly or consume too much of your resources, cut ties with them. (Or at least start spending as little time as possible with them.)

Why? Keep in mind that Shogun Method isn’t about general self-improvement. It is and always will be focused on dating and relationships. It’s about getting the girl. It’s about Enslavement.

Your social relationships – friends, co-workers, business partners, etc. – are icing on the cake.

And having relationships with people who leech from you or treat you badly? It’s bad icing that ruins the rest of the cake.

• Unfair relationships lower your status in society, making you less charismatic.
• They also sap you of resources that you could have invested in better relationships.

Now, let’s say you did an “audit” of the relationships in your life. And you found that some of the people in your life are ingrates or freeloaders… and yet you want to keep them in your life. Maybe they’re your best friends or loved ones you can’t abandon. What should you do?

You’ll need to “balance the trades,” that’s what. It’s an important skill by itself. If you want to become truly charismatic, you’ll want it in your toolbox.

Want to learn how to “balance the trades” in your life? Then check out the Social Shogun Guidebook, a new standalone program on social intelligence and persuasion.

A precursor to Beyond Enslavement, the Social Shogun Guidebook adapts a handful of core Shogun Method principles to be used to gain power in everyday situations. Recommended for Shoguns who want to be more persuasive in their daily dealings with people – co-workers, bosses, friends, family, strangers on the street, your enemies or rivals, anyone.

Get the Social Shogun Guidebook free by purchasing Shogun Method Black Book Volume 3.

Are you currently in a problematic relationship? Do you feel like you’re on the verge of breaking up with the woman in your life? And are you willing to do whatever it takes to save your relationship or marriage?

Alternatively, if you are not already in a relationship, but you have your eyes on a woman –

Do you find it hard to make her attracted to you? And do you want a simple (and yet effective) solution that will spike her interest in you.

Yes?

Let’s take a look at three guys who are facing problems with women. Each of these three guys had a serious fight with their women, and they were all on the brink of breaking up. Let’s call them Thomas, Richard and Harold.

The Story of Thomas, Richard and Harold

To fix the problem, these three guys took three different approaches.

The first guy, Thomas, “Love-Bombed” his woman. As its name implies, he “bombed his woman with love” at every turn. He apologized. He told her he’d do anything to make it up to her. He treated her like a queen, took her on fancy dates, bought her gifts, and so on.

To his shock and disappointment, his woman STILL broke up with him, hooking up with another man soon after.

Now, the second guy, Richard, used a different approach. He did the OPPOSITE of “Love-Bombing” his woman. He simply gave her the silent treatment. He made no effort to fix the problem, waiting for her to crawl back to him and apologize instead.

What happened? His woman did make up with him, only to get into another fight with him later on. The cycle repeated a few times until finally, fed up, she broke up with him and never came back.

And that brings us to the third guy, Harold, who used a combination of the first and second guys’ approaches.

• First, he “Love-Bombed” his woman for a week…
• …Then he did a complete 180 and treated her coldly the following week.

Long story short? His woman stayed. And not only that, but she was also a lot happier, and the relationship much stronger, than ever before.

Now, back to reality. As you might have guessed by now, Thomas, Richard and Harold are generalizations. They’re the three approaches men take when they want to save their relationships.

And as you’ve seen, two of the approaches lead to failure – the relationship ends eventually. Only one approach – Harold’s – leads to success.

Now, just to show you the proof behind these claims, we’ll take a closer look at each of the three.

Mistake #1: Love-Bombing Only

This is Thomas’ approach, and it’s the approach that I’d say 67% of men take when their relationships are sinking. Think of it as the “nice guy’s solution.”

It’s the knee-jerk reaction. Men today are taught to treat women like queens, and when you’ve offended your queen, you grovel to save your neck.

Unfortunately, incessantly Love-Bombing your woman tends to hurt the relationship. This 2017 study showed that “red-carpet treatment” makes women EXPECT more and more of it. So slip up one more time, and you’ve got hell to pay.

What’s worse, Love-Bombing can actually make your woman more likely to leave you for another man. This oft-cited study established that women look for “alpha males” at least once a month. 

Love-Bombing makes you look “beta.” And the more “beta” she sees you as, the more tempting it is for her to trade you in for a better model.

So let that be your first big lesson for this Insider’s Guide: Love-Bombing is a disaster when used by itself.

Mistake #2: Not Love-Bombing At All

This is Richard’s approach, and the approach taken by, I’d say, 30% of men today. Think of it as the “bad boy’s solution.”

These are the guys who are either:

1. Born vicious, naturally selfish, or simply uncaring, or…
2. Men who are versed enough with women to know that Love-Bombing is NOT the way to go. (And so they do the OPPOSITE of Love-Bombing.)

Most people would think that if a man treated his woman coldly right after a fight, she’d leave him right away. Strangely enough, in the real world, the opposite is true. Women tend to stay longer with men who treat them badly than with men who Love-Bomb them.

Why? A few years ago, a landmark study in psychology found that women react to stress, such as that inflicted by a vicious partner, in a “tend and befriend” way. As it turns out, “fight or flight” is only the male’s response to stress.

We see relationships like this all the time, right? They all die a slow death. And yet they DO die in the end, with the woman finally mustering up the willpower to leave her abusive man.

And that leaves us with:

How To Love-Bomb Your Woman Into Loving You Again

This is Harold’s approach. It involves Love-Bombing your woman for a week, then acting extremely cold to her in the second week.

Noticed something? It’s a two-week-long, heavy-duty application of Fractionation. You put her on an emotional rollercoaster she won’t ever forget.

After a week of thrilling highs, she crashes down to rock-bottom during the second week. You won’t be explaining yourself (or even make zero contact with her) throughout this second week. As a result, she’ll feel extremely helpless and vulnerable.

When you do re-engage her, she’ll feel two things:

1. An unbelievably powerful tidal wave of relief, and…
2. An irresistible urge to get an explanation to you at any cost – even make compromises with you.

That’s why this is the perfect time to lay out your “new demands” for her. She either complies or you’re gone forever. If she’s shaken enough by your emotional rollercoaster, then she’ll gladly agree to your demands.

Risky, you say? You bet. And yet it’s the only approach that will give your relationship a fighting chance of staying in one piece.

And not just that. Do it correctly, and your relationship will come out even stronger than ever. Believe me because this is true.

The truth is that a very small number of men understand this approach. They’re either Shoguns or they’re very familiar with how the female mind works. (E.g. clinical psychologists).

The Fractionation effect is thoroughly documented in science, even if it’s not called such per se. For instance, this study calls it the “Excitation Transfer Theory.” It shows that people feel more attracted even to strangers after emotional rollercoasters.

In the context of your relationship, you’re the only person she can transfer the excitement to. In the end, she’ll stay with you, she’ll be happier for it, and the relationship can now last a lifetime.

Brilliant, right? The good news is that you, too, can have the same power.

Is She Losing Interest In You? Here’s What To Do.

You might be thinking: “Derek, that’s easier said than done.”

To that, I say: “What isn’t?” 

And yet I got even THAT challenge covered. I suggest you take the time to download the ReSeduction: Aftershock premium program. It’s a new companion guide to our ReSeduction 2.0 course.

In it, you’ll see how Love-Bombing fits in a three-step process that will save your relationship. If you’re afraid of breaking up with her, then this is your best chance at keeping her.

If you’re in the middle of a problematic relationship, or if you want to revive a woman’s interest in you, then use the Aftershock tactic on her. You’ll be amazed at the results – I can guarantee it.

The ReSeduction: Aftershock is free with every purchase of ReSeduction 2.0. If you already own ReSeduction 2.0, you can find it inside your ReSeduction client’s area.

Having trouble moving women up the IRAE Model? Then what you’re about to learn in this Insider’s Guide will make things so much easier from now on.

Imagine women immediately falling in love with you, thinking you’re “the one,” and working hard to “win” you. That’s what you get when you know how to develop emotional connection with them.

Now, you might be asking: What exactly is emotional connection?

In Shogun Method, it’s when a woman feels very strong, irresistible romantic feelings for you. When a woman feels an emotional connection with you, she moves up the IRAE Model much more easily.

There are three steps to developing emotional connection with a woman:

1. Making her “fall in love” and think “you’re the one”
2. Making her “prove” herself to you
3. Making her know you’re in charge

Let’s take a look at each step in turn.

Step #1: Making Her “Fall In Love” And Think “You’re The One”

When a woman falls in love with you and thinks you’re “the one” for her, she’s all yours. It’s enough to make even the most conservative women out there pledge their whole lives to you.

How exactly do you make a woman fall in love with you? Most Shoguns before you have found lots of success with the following formula.

First, you learn about her insecurities, fears, flaws, etc. through Value Elicitation. This is easiest done when talking about her previous relationships. Or if she’s single, talk about her ideal man and/or relationship.

Then you link yourself to her “positive” values and disassociate from the negatives. This is most easily and subtly done by Anchoring.

Here’s a good example using the “Ladder of Agreement” Shogun Sequence (taken from Shogun Sequences Handbook Volume II):

• “You strike me as the kind of girl who has many stories to tell. Am I right?”
• “Let me guess – there’s a bunch of guys in your life, but they all disappoint you somehow. Am I spot on?” (motion away from you)
• “I know how you feel. Like you want a guy who loves you (motion towards yourself) but also respects your freedom. Right?”
• “It’s like you read my mind. I’ll be honest – I’m not ready for something long-term either. (motion away from you) I just want to have fun, be successful, and not be lonely (motion towards you). You feel me?”
• “Exactly. I mean, come on. We’re adults. We know the rules, right? No love, no guilt, and no telling. If you find someone mature enough to follow those rules (motion towards you), then it’s all good, right?“

Step #2: Making Her “Prove” Herself To You

Most guys make the mistake of trying to “prove themselves” to a woman. Shoguns know it should be the other way around.

The most passive way to make women prove themselves to you is by having Outcome Independence. That is, you live your life in such a way that whether or not she dates or sleeps with you, you’re fine. You’d go ahead with your awesome life either way.

Outcome Independence sends women the message: “I’m living my own grand adventure here. You can come along if you want.”

Step #3: Making Her Know You’re In Charge

Most guys act all “alpha” in the beginning, only to slip into needy “beta” behavior later on. This tells women you’re actually not in charge of your life and your relationship.

The key, then, is to keep the frame that you’re in charge at all times. There are two tried-and-tested ways to achieve this:

1. Impose the Master/Slave Frame at all times. You’re the wise, benevolent Master and she’s your loyal, supportive Slave.
2. Use Dread Game if possible. And even if you don’t use Dread Game, simply understand and respect the concept of Dread. The one who’s more ready and willing to leave the other is the one who holds the power in your relationship. And it has to be you.

How To Develop Emotional Connection With A Woman In Three Steps

So how do you develop emotional connection with a woman? In three steps:

1. Make her fall in love with you and think you’re “the one”;
2. Make her “prove herself” to you; and
3. Make her know you’re in charge, not her.

A Shogun Sequence is designed to do all three steps in one swoop. It does this by hypnotic storytelling – a psychological device that bypasses a woman’s conscious mind to tap directly into her subconscious.

Shogun Sequences are like a set of Swiss Army tools in your Shogun Method arsenal that helps you tackle different situations in your relationship.

For example, the “Frozen Tear” routine quickly re-triggers a woman’s attraction to you (useful if she’s losing interest) and forces her to seek your validation as an authority. Or, you can use the “Hyper Enslavement” routine to solidify your girlfriend or wife’s loyalty to you. Or, deploy the “Rusty Nail” to prevent a horrible breakup.

“Frozen Tear”, “Hyper Enslavement” and the “Rusty Nail” (together with 22 other Shogun Sequences) are found inside the second volume of Shogun Sequence Handbook.

A “Verbal Weakness” is a word, phrase, or mannerism that makes you look LESS dominant to women. As a result, women will find you less attractive than you really are. Verbal Weaknesses are sadly common among men, and it’s important to know yours and fix them as soon as you can.

All-in-all, there are 10 Verbal Weaknesses to check yourself against. In this Insider’s Guide, we’ll tackle the three most common ones.

See if you’re guilty of any of them, and make a conscious effort to weed them out.

Verbal Weakness #1: Over-Emotion

Over-Emotion is when you try to establish your dominance via your tone of voice. For instance, if you’re angry or passionate, people will know it in your voice.

You’re the overzealous drill sergeant. The dramatic protagonist who gives the stirring speech. The antihero with the insightful monologue.

And no, women do NOT find it attractive for a simple reason. It tells them you’re a slave to your emotions instead of the other way around.

If it takes so little to get you riled up and show it, it doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence in your leadership skills.

What’s worse, Over-Emotion moves you AWAY from Enslavement. It doesn’t help with Rapport-building (it creates Contextual Rapport which leads to the friend zone), and it doesn’t trigger Attraction.

If you’re Over-Emotive and you’re having trouble escalating through the IRAE Model, now you know why.

How do you fix the problem? You need to develop the mannerism of never being fazed by your situation and environment. You’ve “seen it all before,” and nothing stresses you out.

At the very least, when you feel the strong emotions welling up, train yourself to bite your tongue. Project a stone-cold, calm demeanor at all times.

Verbal Weakness #2: Wordiness

Wordiness is when you use lots of unnecessary words, phrases, and fillers in your speech. These are the “Uhms,” the “Ahhs,” the “a little bits,” and the “I thinks.”

In addition, Wordiness is also when you interrupt her while she’s speaking. If you find yourself butting in without even meaning to, then this is your Verbal Weakness.

It’s also when you have the uncontrollable habit of embellishing your statements. For instance, if a woman asks what you do for a living, and you launch into story after story about your stellar contributions to the last company you worked for… you’re Wordy.

(Contrast this with deliberate embellishment — a strategic tool in many Shogun Sequences. If embellishing your stories is something you do unconsciously, that’s bad. It very quickly turns you into a bore or showoff.)

Wordiness is unattractive because it reveals a fatal flaw in you – you’re needy. You’re instinctively after the approval of other people. And to women, a needy man is worse than a broke, ugly man.

To counter Wordiness, train yourself to be a “man of few words.” Remember that the fewer words you use to convey your ideas and commands, the more dominant you appear.

Verbal Weakness #3: Self-Deprecation

Self-Deprecation is speaking negatively of yourself and the things you do.

If you tell a woman what you do for a living and she’s massively impressed, and you say:

“Nah, anyone can do it…” 

…that’s Self-Deprecation.

Contrary to what many people think, Self-Deprecation isn’t normal. It’s not even necessarily “socially-acceptable.”

In fact, women can immediately spot it for what it is. It’s at best a need for other people’s validation, and at worst a real, sore lack of self-confidence.

Now, some men might say: “I’m not Self-Deprecating – I’m just humble.”

To that, I say: It’s great that you’re humble. Unfortunately, humility doesn’t help you escalate through the IRAE Model. Instead, it gets you friend-zoned real fast. Believe me because this is true.

So to counter Self-Deprecation, should you resort to bragging or being an asshole? Nope – none of the above leads you any closer to Enslavement.

Instead, Self-Deprecation is countered by being flippy. You tell her what you do for a living, she’s massively impressed, and you say: “But wait! There’s more!”, and you talk about your latest hobby and ask her about hers.

Put simply: Learn to laugh at your strengths and weaknesses, and no one can ever use them against you.

How About +7 Other Verbal Weaknesses?

There are seven other Verbal Weaknesses out there. Each one has its own respective path to Verbal Dominance. I strongly suggest you learn all of them to become a truly dominant, truly attractive Shogun.

Every Shogun who enrolls into my private, face-to-face coaching goes through this checklist of ten Verbal Weaknesses and check them off even before they start my coaching sessions.

Why? Well, the reason’s simple: all the Shogun Sequences and covert routine they learn will amount to nothing if they cannot deliver them properly.

Now, if you find yourself stuck with a Shogun Method technique or Shogun Sequence, then it’s likely that you are stuck with a couple of these Verbal Mistakes in your delivery.

To check yourself against all ten Verbal Weaknesses, download your copy of “Verbal Dominance“. You can find it as an add-on to the Shogun Sequences Handbook Volume 2 program.

Welcome back.

This is the second (and final) part of the Derek Rake Insider’s Guide “Shogun Method For Pickup”. If you have missed the first part, click here.

The “ETA” is the modified Shogun Method protocol for the use in approaches and quick dates. It stands for “Escalating To Attraction”, and refers to the progression to the first three stages inside the IRAE Model.

In the ETA, we stop at the Attract stage. (For pickup and short-term relationships, Enslavement is unnecessary).

In the first part of the Insider’s Guide, we have talked about the following:

1. The Fundamentals – things you should have covered before you try ETA. (Important if you don’t want to waste your time)
2. Intrigue Pings – how to approach women WITHOUT using cheesy pickup lines
3. Shogun-Style Conversations – how to build Rapport quickly with the least likelihood of rejection.

Now let’s keep going. After you reach the Rapport Inflexion Point – where your target starts feeling interested in you, too – that’s when it’s time for…

The Fourth Step: Creating Sexual Tension

You’re already in a conversation with her. Before it gets too interesting, you MUST make the conversation sexual. Otherwise, you’re rushing headlong into her friend zone.

My advice? Create some sexual tension. And the most natural way to do that is with Fractionation.

You’ll want to start rollercoastering her between platonic and romantic topics.

Here’s an example of how that looks…

YOU: (Platonic) “So how long did you live in Greece before moving elsewhere? I hear it’s a beautiful there, although it’s been a bit crazy lately.”

HER: (Answers your question)

YOU: (Romantic) “I see. It’s funny because you remind me of my first girlfriend. She was born in a town very close to Sparta. She was quirky because she’d scream ‘Prepare for glory!’ before jumping into bed with me. Not even kidding. (Back to Platonic) So anyway, are you a travel blogger full-time, or are you doing other things too?”

HER: (Answers your question)

YOU: (Platonic) “You’re taking up culinary arts? Hey, awesome. I took up classes in the past too. What’s your specialty?”

HER: (Answers your question)

YOU: (Romantic) “Sounds awesome. I love Italian food too. Which is ironic, because I was actually heading to a pasta place after this. (Name the place.) We should totally hang out. I’ll show you later. (Back to Platonic) So anyway, enough about work. What do you do for fun?”

You get the idea, right?

As an extra tip, you’ll want to combine Fractionation with Anchoring. That way, you’ll associate the Romantic notes WITH you, and the Platonic notes AWAY from you.

It’s fairly simple and subtle to do that:

• While you’re on a Platonic tangent, use your hands to motion away from you.
• When you’re on a Romantic note, motion towards you.

Now, when you’re Fractionating her, she might resist by throwing a shit test your way. Here’s how to be prepared for them.

The Fifth Step: Passing Shit Tests

What’s a shit test? Thinking of it as a woman “giving you shit” to test how manly you are. In first-time conversations, shit tests usually come in the form of insults and dares. They can range from mild to devastatingly severe.

Here are a few common examples of shit tests:

• “Are you talking to me?”
• “I bet you pick up lots of women.”
• “Who do you think you are?”
• “You look ridiculous.”
• “There’s only one thing on your mind, isn’t there?”

Shit tests can come out of nowhere. Inexperienced men tend to get offended, get mad, get emotional, or panic and apologize.

And that’s exactly how you FAIL a shit test. It proves to women that you’re NOT that confident and dominant after all. It shows your weakness and insecurity, and it reveals that you’re really just reading out of a script.

On the other hand, if you react WELL to the shit test, then the opposite happens. She actually feels much more impressed – and much more attracted to you – as a result.

When you can pass shit tests, then ETA becomes much easier. Making women fall in love with you becomes a matter of WHEN, not IF.

So how do you pass shit tests in first-time conversations? You have three strategies to choose from.

Shit Test Handler #1: Flip The Tables

First, you can put the pressure back on her. For example:

YOU: “…my first girlfriend was born in a town very close to Sparta…”

HER: (Shit testing) “I bet you pick up lots of women.”

YOU: (Put pressure back on her) “…do you say that to every guy you talk to?” (With a puzzled smile)

Or: 

YOU: “…wait, why do you care about the women chasing me?”

Or:

YOU: “…Maybe. Are you seeing other men?” (Joke half-meant)

Keep putting the pressure back on her until she laughs to break the tension before you do. That’s your sign that you passed her test.

Shit Test Handler #2: Don’t Give A Fuck

Second, you can brush it off, like the shit test doesn’t faze you (and it shouldn’t). For example:

YOU: “…my first girlfriend was born in a town very close to Sparta…”

HER: (Shit testing) “Are you talking to me?”

YOU: (Ignore) “…and she was quirky because she’d scream ‘Prepare for glory!’ before jumping into bed. Not even kidding. So anyway, are you a travel blogger full-time, or…”

She might feel insulted when you ignore her like that, but that’s fine. It’s better than failing the shit test. Plus, you can always Fractionate her by giving her an emotional high soon after.

Shit Test Handler #3: Agree Forcefully

And thirdly, you can agree  forcefully. That is, you AGREE with her shit-test and double-down on it in a funny way.

YOU: “…my first girlfriend was born in a town very close to Sparta…”

HER: (Shit testing) “You pick up a lot of women, don’t you.”

YOU: (Agree and double-down) “…Oh yeah, thousands. I drove a bus for years.”

Or:

YOU: “…my first girlfriend was born in a town very close to Sparta…”

HER: (Shit testing) “There’s only one thing on your mind, isn’t there.”

YOU: (Agree and double-down) “…No, unless there’s only one thing you can offer?” (With a sarcastic “don’t be silly” smile)

Again: The better your fundamentals are (see Part 1), the higher your SV will be. You’ll be shit-tested less when doing ETA.

That being said, shit tests are just a part of dating and relationships. Even married men get shit-tested by their wives now and then.

The ability to pass shit tests isn’t just an Escalating-To-Attraction skill. It’s a life skill. Get it.

And now for the big finale…

The Last Step: Completing the Manipulation

To get a date, the key is to make your target think she WILL go out with you – it’s just a matter of how.

So how do you make the date happen? I recommend at least one of the following two techniques:

The Yes Ladder

This is when you ask questions she can easily answer with “Yes.” This flips a switch in her subconscious – the more she “agrees” with you, the more she likes you. So when you ask her to go on a date with you that same day, she’ll likely say “Yes” to that, too.

Good “Yes Ladders” have three components, all of which you should use:

• There’s Reverberation, or when you repeat something she said. For instance, if she says, “I was born in Athens,” you can Reverb by asking: “Oh, in Greece?” Naturally, she’ll say “Yes.” Or if she says: “I’m an accountant,” you can Reverb: “Oh, so you’re a numbers person.”
• There’s Generalization, or when you give broad generalizations she can’t help but agree with. For instance, if she says she moved to get away from home, you can generalize by saying: “Your life, your rules, huh?” (Other generalizations include “Something always goes wrong, huh?” or “People never understand, do they?”
• Then there’s Attachment, where you give your suggestion to go on a date. For instance, you can say: “So since you’re new here, you must want to make new friends, right?” Or: “Since you’ve piqued my curiosity, will you let me buy you a cup of coffee?”

The Illusion of Choice

If you’re feeling ballsy, you can give her two options, both of which will move the interaction closer to the date.

For instance, you can say: “So, do you want to get coffee now, or later?” or: “So, will you give me your number now, or should I wait until after we have that coffee?”

This technique works best when you’re fairly sure she’s into you, too. Then she wouldn’t notice the false choice in front of her and readily go with you.

ETA: Recap

So here’s a quick recap of the six steps to Escalate To Attraction:

1. Get your Fundamentals down tight
2. Engage your target with an Intrigue Ping
3. Build Rapport with Shogun-style conversations
4. Create Sexual Tension using Fractionation
5. Pass Shit Tests by ignoring, putting the pressure on her, or agreeing and doubling down
6. Complete the manipulation with Yes Ladders or the Illusion of Choice technique

Now, are you new to Shogun Method or to approaching women in general? If so, you might want to hedge your bets by setting up next-day dates instead of same-day ones. Your Illusion of Choice might go this way: “Should we meet up tonight or tomorrow?”

It’s easier for a woman to pick one of your false choices then, but it’s also easier for her to flake out on the date. So it’s a two-edged sword. Always have the option to meet on the same day.

And lastly, remember to never use ETA – and Shogun Method as a whole – to take advantage of women. Responsible, honorable Shoguns only.

Further Reading: The “Strong Trilogy”

To complete your “pickup” knowledge, I recommend the “Strong Trilogy”. It’s a set of three volumes of techniques on pickup developed by Shaun, our resident “short-term relationship” expert at Shogun Method HQ.

• The “S.A.S: Shogun Approach Strategy” is an effective roadmap to successful approaches, setting the woman up for lasting attraction beyond the approach stage. 

• The “Humor Attraction Playbook” shows the Shogun’s way on exploiting humor as a Mind Control attraction device.

• The “Date Optimizer” will show you how to “pack” the essential Shogun Method techniques – Fractionation, Value Elicitation Sequence, Rollercoaster Storytelling and ENTICE/REPEL into a single date… and make her emotionally addicted to you right from the start.

You can get all three volumes in the “Strong Trilogy” (“S.A.S: Shogun Approach Strategy”, “Humor Attraction Playbook” and “Date Optimizer”) for free. Buy Intrigue Black Book and receive the “Strong Trilogy” at no extra charge.